The children of Mars are in a funk, and nothing on the red planet seems to be able to cheer them up. Martian King Kimar comes up with the only reasonable solution: kidnap Santa Claus from Earth's North Pole and bring him to their planet to make toys for their joyless, listless little green kids. Meanwhile, two Earth children get wise to the plan and are abducted along with Santa to prevent them from talking to the authorities. Luckily for them, Dropo, the Jerry Lewis of the fourth planet from the sun, is there to help them. The fiendish plot doesn't go according to plan, and there's plenty of intrigue, double-crossing, mistaken identity and stock footage for kids of all ages and planets to enjoy. Poorly conceived, sloppily made, and unfailingly bizarre, "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians" is the ultimate Christmas movie-riffing classic (as fans of MST3K know) which is why Cinematic Titanic chose to revisit, re-riff, and release this holiday hamfest with all new jokes. Merry Crap-mas!
Himself
Himself
The children of Mars are in a funk, and nothing on the red planet seems to be able to cheer them up. Martian King Kimar comes up with the only reasonable solution: kidnap Santa Claus from Earth's North Pole and bring him to their planet to make toys for their joyless, listless little green kids. Meanwhile, two Earth children get wise to the plan and are abducted along with Santa to prevent them from talking to the authorities. Luckily for them, Dropo, the Jerry Lewis of the fourth planet from the sun, is there to help them. The fiendish plot doesn't go according to plan, and there's plenty of intrigue, double-crossing, mistaken identity and stock footage for kids of all ages and planets to enjoy. Poorly conceived, sloppily made, and unfailingly bizarre, "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians" is the ultimate Christmas movie-riffing classic (as fans of MST3K know) which is why Cinematic Titanic chose to revisit, re-riff, and release this holiday hamfest with all new jokes. Merry Crap-mas!
2008-11-20
8
Winner of 7 Tony Awards, including Best Musical, The Wiz was a massive Broadway hit which spawned a dismal feature film starring Diana Ross and Michael Jackson. Executive Producers Craig Zadan and Neil Meron have assembled a Tony-winning creative team, the imaginative Cirque du Soleil Theatrical and a diverse cast of showstoppers designed to create an eye-popping new take on the musical unlike anything ever seen.
As the 100th anniversary of Titanic's sinking approaches, a team of scientists, engineers, archaeologists and imaging experts have joined forces to answer one of the most haunting questions surrounding the legendary disaster: Just how did the "unsinkable" ship break apart and plunge into the icy waters of the North Atlantic? Written by History Channel
Rey develops her newly discovered abilities with the guidance of Luke Skywalker, who is unsettled by the strength of her powers. Meanwhile, the Resistance prepares to do battle with the First Order.
An other-worldly story, set against the backdrop of Cold War era America circa 1962, where a mute janitor working at a lab falls in love with an amphibious man being held captive there and devises a plan to help him escape.
Thrust into an all-new adventure, a down-on-his-luck Capt. Jack Sparrow feels the winds of ill-fortune blowing even more strongly when deadly ghost sailors led by his old nemesis, the evil Capt. Salazar, escape from the Devil's Triangle. Jack's only hope of survival lies in seeking out the legendary Trident of Poseidon, but to find it, he must forge an uneasy alliance with a brilliant and beautiful astronomer and a headstrong young man in the British navy.
Armed with the astonishing ability to shrink in scale but increase in strength, master thief Scott Lang must embrace his inner-hero and help his mentor, Doctor Hank Pym, protect the secret behind his spectacular Ant-Man suit from a new generation of towering threats. Against seemingly insurmountable obstacles, Pym and Lang must plan and pull off a heist that will save the world.
Harry, Ron and Hermione walk away from their last year at Hogwarts to find and destroy the remaining Horcruxes, putting an end to Voldemort's bid for immortality. But with Harry's beloved Dumbledore dead and Voldemort's unscrupulous Death Eaters on the loose, the world is more dangerous than ever.
Chris and his girlfriend Rose go upstate to visit her parents for the weekend. At first, Chris reads the family's overly accommodating behavior as nervous attempts to deal with their daughter's interracial relationship, but as the weekend progresses, a series of increasingly disturbing discoveries lead him to a truth that he never could have imagined.
The story of American showman P.T. Barnum, founder of the circus that became the famous traveling Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus.
Andy heads off to Cowboy Camp, leaving his toys to their own devices. Things shift into high gear when an obsessive toy collector named Al McWhiggen, owner of Al's Toy Barn kidnaps Woody. Andy's toys mount a daring rescue mission, Buzz Lightyear meets his match and Woody has to decide where he and his heart truly belong.
After arriving in India, Indiana Jones is asked by a desperate village to find a mystical stone. He agrees – and stumbles upon a secret cult plotting a terrible plan in the catacombs of an ancient palace.
Cars fly, trees fight back, and a mysterious house-elf comes to warn Harry Potter at the start of his second year at Hogwarts. Adventure and danger await when bloody writing on a wall announces: The Chamber Of Secrets Has Been Opened. To save Hogwarts will require all of Harry, Ron and Hermione’s magical abilities and courage.
The crew of the colony ship Covenant, bound for a remote planet on the far side of the galaxy, discovers what they think is an uncharted paradise but is actually a dark, dangerous world.
An Amazon princess comes to the world of Man in the grips of the First World War to confront the forces of evil and bring an end to human conflict.
Four teenagers in detention discover an old video game console with a game they’ve never heard of. When they decide to play, they are immediately sucked into the jungle world of Jumanji in the bodies of their avatars. They’ll have to complete the adventure of their lives filled with fun, thrills and danger or be stuck in the game forever!
Five years have passed since Hiccup and Toothless united the dragons and Vikings of Berk. Now, they spend their time charting unmapped territories. During one of their adventures, the pair discover a secret cave that houses hundreds of wild dragons -- and a mysterious dragon rider. Hiccup and Toothless find themselves at the center of a battle to protect Berk from a power-hungry warrior.
After his career is destroyed, a brilliant but arrogant surgeon gets a new lease on life when a sorcerer takes him under her wing and trains him to defend the world against evil.
Law enforcement finds itself chasing the ghost of a man dead for over a decade, embroiled in a diabolical new game that's only just begun.
When the creator of a popular video game system dies, a virtual contest is created to compete for his fortune.
During a lunar eclipse, seven friends gather for dinner and decide to play a game in which they must share with each other the content of every message, email or phone call they receive throughout the evening.
On Christmas eve, Serge is the only on-call emergency doctor available. Struck by a crippling back-ache, he gets help from a pizza delivery boy who will need to step in the doctor's shoes.
A young French teenage girl after moving to a new city falls in love with a boy and is thinking of having sex with him because her girlfriends have already done it.
Romance rekindles for Peyton and her closest friends when her parents decide to host a holiday themed reunion before selling their family owned summer camp.
Taylor, a journalist, and Luke, in the military, share a special bond that grows between them over the course of several Christmases that they spend together and apart.
Celebrate the season Scooby-Doo style as Scooby-Doo and the Mystery, Inc. gang face off festive frights, frosty nights and - jeepers - the ghost of Christmas, who wants to wish everyone a scary Christmas! In this collection of cold-weather capers, Scooby-Doo and the gang unwrap a series of mysteries in order to stop a group of chilling crooks from stealing the spirits of the season!
During the holiday season, when the animals of the Central Park Zoo are preparing for Christmas, Private, the youngest of the penguins notices that the Polar Bear is all alone. Assured that nobody should have to spend Christmas alone, Private goes into the city for some last-minute Christmas shopping. Along the way, he gets stuffed into a stocking
Marion is about to divorce from her husband and takes her 15-year-old niece, Pauline, on a vacation to Granville. There, she meets an old love...
In suburban Chicago during the late 1980s, ten-year-old Jake Doyle embarks on a herculean quest to get the latest and greatest video game system for Christmas.
You'd better watch out - Santa Claus Willie T. Soke is coming to town, and he doesn't care if you've been naughty or nice. Wille's favorite holiday tradition is to fill his sacks with loot lifted from shopping malls across the country. But this year his plot gets derailed by a wisecracking store detective, a sexy bartender, and a kid who's convinced Willie is the real Santa Claus.
A father, who can't keep his promises, dies in a car accident. One year later, he returns as a snowman, who has the final chance to put things right with his son before he is gone forever.
Four best friends (Tibby, Lena, Carmen & Bridget) who buy a mysterious pair of pants that fits each of them, despite their differing sizes, and makes whoever wears them feel fabulous. When faced with the prospect of spending their first summer apart, the pals decide they'll swap the pants so that each girl in turn can enjoy the magic.
When Champion City's hero Captain Amazing is kidnapped by the recently paroled supervillain Casanova Frankenstein, a trio of average, everyday superheroes -- Mr. Furious, the Shoveler and the Blue Raja -- assemble a new super team to save him.
This was supposed to be the Christmas Tiffany finally gets reunited with her long-time crush Brett– but when she finds out he has a serious girlfriend, who is just perfect, she is devastated. Tiffany hatches a plan with a recently heartbroken Peter, to win back the affection of their respective soulmates by pretending to be a couple in love, but soon realise that they have more in common than they ever realised… Tiffany might just find love this Christmas after all.
Its Christmas and Kate runs a nostalgic gift store shop in neighborhood that has just been slated for redevelopment A chance encounter on the bus with Mark sets off sparks for them both.
Small town wedding planner Rachel is planning her biggest Christmas wedding for an influencer couple, is thrown a surprise when the bride's manager turns out to be Logan, her first love and high school sweetheart - her one that got away.
A retelling of the classic Dickens tale of Ebenezer Scrooge, miser extraordinaire. He is held accountable for his dastardly ways during night-time visitations by the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future.
A teenage girl on vacation in the Bahamas with her divorced father tries to impress a potential boyfriend by saying that her father is actually her lover. Remake of the 1991 French film Mon père, ce héros.